Miles Away:
Reflections ng Isang Nanay na OFW Expat
By: Lynn Carpio (Seoul)
A year had passed since I left my children under the paternal care of my husband. Leaving them wasn't that easy. It took me a lot of courage and determination before I finally settled on this decision. I thought that the problems I had experienced were the toughest ones, but I was wrong. I never thought that being separated from them would be very difficult for all of us and will be most painful too. Everything had changed abruptly and I didn't know how or where to begin.
The first few months were very hard for me, every morning when I woke up was a totally different day. I missed the things I normally did everyday when we were together. I used to cook and attend to their needs personally, and my children were accustomed to that. At the end of the day, when all of them got home, we used to eat together, talked and laughed together, and even made funny jokes on each other. Sometimes, misunderstandings occurred just like in any normal family, but we didn't allow it to become serious. We patched things as soon as we could. Even at a young age, my children were very sensible. We were very dependent on each other. But the separation resulted in a lot of changes and adjustments.
Since I left, I no longer witnessed the important events in their lives. How I wished I was there to comfort them when they were sick or when they had problems....how I wished I could hug them tightly and kiss them the way I used to. Every second...every minute...everyday of my life...I missed them.
But that was life....
The innovations of technology paved the way not only for the people who lived in distant and different lands, but it also made distance parenting possible. Though homesickness is still a disease we cannot avoid, but at least the intensity has been lessened. We no longer experience the difficulty in communicating with our family. There are many ways now how we can make it up for our absence.
For instance, I make sure that as much as possible I talk to them everyday, check if everything is okay or if there is something wrong. During those times that they are sick, I see to it that the communication line is always open, so that I can monitor their condition. As a mother, it is one of my greatest fears. And maybe I am overprotective of my children but I think all mothers are. Not a single moment did I miss calling or chatting with them via the internet.
Physically, I may be miles away from them and nothing can compensate for those moments when we are together, but my thoughts and love are always with them. Little by little, they are learning to be independent and I'm proud to say that the distance between us did not change or diminish their love and respect for me. Already they are grown-ups but they are still my babies who seek my guidance, advise and my opinion before doing anything.
I am very thankful because God has blessed me with very loving and thoughtful angels, "my children". And I am looking forward to the day...the day of our reunion.
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Filipina Artist (Singapore)
